I Take Medication for my PPOCD

Let’s talk meds. You’re not alone if the idea of having this conversation makes you uncomfortable. Because for some reason, we are still vehemently fighting the stigma around the need to take psychiatric medications especially while pregnant and/or nursing. It’s a controversial topic and one that many moms feel passionately about no matter which side they fall on.

I have ZERO shame in sharing that medication is a crucial part of my overall treatment plan and an integral component of what keeps me in recovery. Medication, as well as therapy, exercise and good self-care are what keep me feeling like me. My dad is diabetic and no one would ever expect him to stop taking his insulin nor would they expect my mom to stop taking her high-blood pressure medication so why is my need for a prescription any different? I don’t know if I will always need medication but if it proves to be essential to helping me live my best life…then I’m more than okay with that.

When it comes to maternal mental illness, not every mom shares my views on taking medication (and that is OKAY!!!). However, for those of you on the fence, I thought it might be helpful to talk through some of the common objections to adding medication to your treatment arsenal.

I can’t take medication while pregnant.

We all wish for healthy, full-term pregnancies without the need for prescription drugs. But the reality is that it often comes down to assessing the potential risks the psychiatric medication may pose for baby versus the potential risks if mom is left untreated. In some cases, the risk to the unborn child may actually be higher if a mother is taken of off, or declines to start, medication. Consider a mom who is suffering from severe depression. Without her medication, she may be unable to function in her daily life which means she’s unable to care for any existing children, eat sensibly, get an adequate amount of sleep and ensure she receives proper prenatal care. She may also be at a higher risk of engaging in dangerous behaviors including smoking and/or substance abuse.

Data is still limited but there are several psychiatric medications that are now considered to be safe during pregnancy. An informed and trustworthy provider will be able to discuss these options as well as help to perform your individual risk assessment.

I can’t take medication while nursing.

Similar to a mom’s concern of her prescription drug(s) being passed to her fetus, many moms also worry about potential side effects to baby should their medication be transmitted through breast milk. If together, mom and provider decide that it is best for mom to continue to include medication as a part of her treatment plan, there are several options that doctors now feel comfortable prescribing to breastfeeding moms. Having the discussion with your doctor will likely help ease some of these fears.

Another helpful tool is LactMed which can be accessed online (https://toxnet.nlm.nih.gov/newtoxnet/lactmed.htm ) or by using the Lactmed app. LactMed is the U.S. National Library of Medicine’s database containing information on drugs (or other chemicals) to which breastfeeding mothers may be exposed, levels of these substances in breast milk and infant blood as well as the possible adverse effects to the nursing infant. Having some background knowledge can help ensure that you are asking your provider all of the questions that are pertinent to your situation.

I want to try natural or alternative remedies.   

GOOD! Therapy, exercise, fresh air, good nutrition, yoga, mediation, acupuncture, light therapy are just a few of the alternative treatments to take into consideration. There are many options that are available to try prior to seeking medication and there are just as many options available to enhance the benefits of medication should these alternative therapies prove to be ineffective on their own. Personally, I needed to complete Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP) therapy, maintain good exercise habits and work extensively on my self-compassion and mindfulness practice in addition to taking my medication daily. Unfortunately, mental illness does not come with an “easy” button but leading a happy and fulfilling life is absolutely possible!

I should be able to do this on my own.

Ever heard the saying, “it takes a village?” I think this phrase was coined specifically with motherhood in mind. Even more so when motherhood is overshadowed by a perinatal mood or anxiety disorder. WHY should you be able to do this on your own? What is the reward for never asking for or accepting help? WHAT should you be able to do on your own? Change your brain chemistry? When posed this way, the concept seems almost ridiculous! You aren’t alone in any of this. Help is available and you deserve to receive it, whatever that looks like for you.

I don’t want to suffer through the trial and error of finding the right medication and/or dose.

I get this one! Embarking on the journey to find the right medication(s) and the right dose(s) was extremely overwhelming for me. If I’m being honest, the first medication you try might not be the best one for you. Or, the medication that worked for you pre-baby may not be as effective post-baby (speaking from personal experience). To add to the misery, many psychiatric medications do not reach their full, therapeutic benefit until 6 to 8 weeks from the time the medication was started and that wait can be agonizing (again, personal experience). I got to a point in my own personal journey where this obstacle became irrelevant because I was merely trying to survive. I was so desperate to go back to the person I knew I was and to be able to enjoy one of the greatest times in my life, that I probably would have stood on my head and recited the alphabet backwards if I knew that was the fix. So when my provider (who I trust completely) said she thought a medication would be helpful, I was fully on board no matter what the adjustment period looked like. Maybe you’re not there yet, and that is okay.

I don’t want to feel like a zombie.

I had the same concern. I had no idea what Alexis on an antidepressant would look like. Would I be able to function? To laugh? To feel? In my experience, my medication has actually allowed me to feel and achieve to a greater degree. During the throes of postpartum-OCD, I was not functioning, nor was I laughing, loving or enjoying any aspect of my life or my family. I was completely engulfed by my disease. Medication helped to lift the darkness, clear my mind and allowed me to thrive. It helped enable me to be able to do the hard work in therapy and make the necessary efforts to care for myself. Something that I don’t think would have been possible otherwise.

Taking medication means acknowledging I have a shameful disorder.

It pains me that some of us are still afraid to admit that we may struggle with mental illness. Going back to the previous examples I gave about my parents, why are those diseases accepted and yet my mental illness may not be? I have never been ashamed of my illness and I’ll tell anyone about it who will listen. Because mine just might be the story that someone else needs to hear in order to have the courage to ask for help. We are working hard to make strides to end the stigma around mental illness, especially during the perinatal period. We still have far to go. You are not your illness nor did you choose to have your illness; but you can choose how you’re going to tackle it and what you might be able to do with it.

The goal of this post is not to preach that medication is the right choice for everyone, because it isn’t. However, it is the right choice for some. Sometimes, it’s as simple as having a conversation with your doctor and other times it means truly reflecting and taking ALL risks into account. If anything, I hope this post has made you reflect on your own perspective (whatever that may be) and has helped you be better able to a approach the topic from a place of non-judgement, self-directed or otherwise. Imagine how we could shift the paradigm if we started to empower ourselves, as well as those around us, to do whatever is needed to live our healthiest and happiest lives? That sounds pretty good to me!

–Written by Alexis Bruce

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